Did you know that many people who like sports also like porn? The two forms of entertainment have collided occasionally over the years. PORN PARODY here collects 40 or so of the highlights.
White Men Can’t Hump
1992 | Coast to Coast | Sal E. Mander
Sean Michaels and Cassidy (a popular one-name pornstar at the time) spoof the basketball buddy flick White Men Can’t Jump. Basketball double entendres abound: “It’s got finger rolls, dunks, loose balls and rim shots. And then the basketball starts!” Heey-yoooooo!
She Got Game
1998 | Video Team | Teri Diver
Monique plays the heavily recruited young natural in this XXX riff on Spike Lee’s He Got Game. Filling out the roster are Crystal Knight, Nico Treasures and Mr. Marcus.
Tracey at the Sex Derby
Gourmet | 1987 | John Shubert
Horse racing’s big event provides the backdrop for this classic porno. “The excitement at Lusty Downs runs high, but not all the action is on the turf. Behind the scenes in the breeding shed, Tracey Adams and her staff are jockeying for position.”
Asscar
2009 | Wicked
Only a compilation, but it sneaks onto the list for the fun stoopid title pun and box cover (though we’re pretty sure no one has ever won a NASCAR race driving a taxi). Bump drafting not only permitted but encouraged.
Dodgeballs
2009 | Brazzers
A hardfought game of co-ed dodgeball surprisingly gives way to a gymnasium orgy. A 25-minute scene available exclusively at the Brazzers network.
Squirts Illustrated
2007 | VCA | Axel Braun
Legendary parody director Axel Braun made three installments of this squirting-themed Sports Illustrated knockoff series. The first one featured cover girl Gwen Diamond and was subtitled “The Porn Star Issue”, though technically every issue of Squirts Illustrated was a porn star issue.
Bad News Bitches (1-4)
2005 | Pink Kitty | Randy Spears
Jenna Haze and Nautica Thorn play baseball — OK, they wear baseball caps briefly, close enough — in this parody released the same year as Richard Linklater’s disappointing remake of The Bad News Bears. Sequels appeared in 2006, 2008 and 2009 before the franchise faded away.
Field of Reams
2012 | Brazzers
If you build it, they will come. One dude builds a baseball field in his backyard, and Kagney Linn Karter and Lylith Lavey come dressed in baseball uniforms. A 35-minute scene available exclusively at the Brazzers network site “Big Tits in Sports”.
Caddysnatch
2004 | Wizard of Ass | Andre Chance
Not really a parody, just a bizarro golf-themed fetish title. If you’ve always wanted to see a Sarah Silverman lookalike put golf balls and clubs in assorted holes, this one’s for you.
Caddy Shack-up
1986 | Vidco Entertainment | Jack Remy
The original Caddyshack porn parody, set at Burning Bush Country Club “where the caddies are the cutest, most curvacious, and voracious club handlers you ever played with on the putting green”. How bout a Fresca?
Bring It On: A XXX Porn Parody
2011 | Smash
Does cheerleading count as a sport? We say yes. Natalia Rossi, Ally Kay, Ivy Winters, Lizz Tayler, Jynx Maze, Nevaeh Givens and Ruby Rayes compete to make it to nationals or regionals or whatever.
Spartacus MMXII
2012 | Wicked | Marcus London
Does gladiatorial combat count as a sport? We say yes. This stylish XXX version of Starz’s Spartacus series was a big hit in 2012.
Celebrity Porno Poker
2005 | Coast To Coast | The Iceman
Does poker count as a sport? We say yes. This 2005 release parodied Bravo’s Celebrity Poker Showdown. James Deen had a threesome with Cassie Young and Rebecca Bardoux in one of his earliest roles.
Furious Fuckers (1 & 2)
2007 | Evil Angel | Rocco Siffredi
This Fast and Furious knockoff substitutes motorcycle racing for cars, which technically makes it more of a Torque porn parody. Siffredi followed up the same year with Furious Fuckers 2: Final Race.
Racer X
2004 | Ultimate | Nicholas Steele
Carmen Luvana plays a superstar race car driver. Despite the title and psychedelic box cover, Racer X borrows more from The Fast and the Furious than from Speed Racer.
Olympic Fever
1979 | Arrow | Phil Marshak
Platinum blonde porn superstar Seka played an Olympic swimming hopeful suffering from a protein deficiency. A skeezy sports doctor recommends a new performance-enhancing diet.
Erotic Olympics
1978 | Fuck Cuts | Gerard Damiano
Vanessa del Rio, Sharon Mitchell and other pornstars “compete” in various X-rated “events”. The USA team boycotted the 1980 Summer Olympics, which made this film doubly important to national morale.
Pornolympics: the Anal Games
2008 | Private | J.F. Romagnoli
Private released this title featuring “22 sluts in the horniest games ever” just before the Beijing Olympics opened. In 2012 the studio followed with the compilation Private Porn Olympics.
DP2: The Mighty Phucks
1994 | Filmco | Loren Sterling
One of the few hockey-themed pornos out there. Cmon, who doesn’t want to watch hot babes with padded gloves and big sticks crosschecking each other? Oddly enough, there was no porn parody of the first Mighty Ducks movie, only the sequel.
Super Ball Sunday
1994 | Powder Puff | Carl Danser
This oddball little experiment in counter-programming stars Chayse Manhattan (probably the only pornstar named after a bank) who distracts her husband and his buddies from the big game.
This Isn’t UFC: Ultimate Fucking Championship (1 & 2)
2011 | Devil’s Film | Sammy Slater
Alexis Texas, Audrey Hollander and Alexis Grace competed in the inaugural UFC porn parody, while Codi Carmichael, Lizz Tayler and Ashlynn Leigh joined for the sequel. Each sex scene takes place in a matted, caged MMA ring.
Game of Dick
2012 | Brazzers
A loose XXX reenactment of the famous Bruce Lee vs Kareem Abdul-Jabbar fight scene from Game of Death. Lexington Steele channels Jabbar, Juelz Ventura dons Lee’s yellow jumpsuit, and redhead Andy San Dimas joins the battle. Originally online only, then included on the Brazzers Presents: The Parodies 2 DVD.
Rockey X
1986 | Penguin | Pat Roggins
Infamous woodsman John Holmes played “Rockey” in one of his final roles. Adam & Eve recently reissued this title on a Holmes box set along with another parody, Saturday Night Beaver. A sequel without Holmes entitled Rockey X 2: The Final Round appeared in 1987 but does not circulate nowadays.
Rocky XXX
2011 | Adam & Eve | Will Ryder
Anthony Rosano plays Rocky and Andy San Dimas plays Adrian in Will Ryder’s goofy riff on the classic underdog tale. There are actual boxing scenes in between the sex. Also starring Lily Labeau, Madison Ivy, Chastity Lynn, Mr. Marcus (as Apollo Creed) and Tyler Knight (as Clubber Lang).
Footballers Wives (First Half & Second Half)
2010-11 | Bluebird | Paul Chaplin
The British soap Footballers Wive$ ran from 2002 to 2006.
Glossy Europorn outfit Bluebird spread its mega-parody over two releases, Footballers Wives: First Half and Footballers Wives: Second Half.Private World Cup: Footballers’ Wives
2010 | Private | Tony Ward
Not based on the British soap, but rather a celebrity impersonation XXX parody of famous football wives and girlfriends. Bobbi Starr plays “Victoria Fuckham”, Carla Cox plays “Leslie Trash”, and Amy Brooke plays “Paris Cliton” (Paris Hilton dated Portuguese superstar Cristiano Ronaldo the year before).
Rollerball
2002 | Heatwave | Jim Powers
Bridgette Kerkove laces up her rollerblades and takes on on the James Caan role in this dystopian sci-fi XXX parody. Yes, there’s actual rollerskating here. The godawful big-budget Hollywood Rollerball remake came out the same year, but the porn version is much more fun.
Roller Dollz
2008 | Adam & Eve-Zero Tolerance | James Avalon
Two studios collaborated on this XXX tribute to the retro bad-girl roller derby craze. Starring Eva Angelina, Penny Flame, Teagan Presley, Sunny Lane, Bree Olson, Kayden Kross, Ava Rose and many more.
This Ain’t ESPN XXX
2011 | Hustler | Otto Bauer
This Hustler parody of the cable sports network includes pornstar lookalikes of Erin Andrews conducting postgame interviews in an NFL locker room, Sara Walsh and John Buccigross cementing their anchor partnership on-air, Angela Sun visiting Shaun White in the hospital, NBA players entertaining groupies, and Danica Patrick shooting a racy new commercial. All celebs impersonated, this is a parody!
Amber Lynn’s Personal Best
1986 | Caballero | Jonathan Burroughs
Personal Best was a sensitive portrait of female athletes and lesbians. The porn parody version was slightly less sensitive. “Amber Lynn is hot to trot in this racy, raunchy marathon of cross-country runners competing for honors and each other’s awesome bodies!”
Tyler’s Wood
2010 | Adam & Eve | David Lord
The Tiger Woods adultery scandal was like catnip to pornographers. This quickie XXX flick starred Tyler Knight as the golfer, Kayden Kross as his blonde model wife, Evan Stone as his caddy, and Diana Doll, Capri Cavalli, Natasha Nice, Andi Anderson and Richelle Rya as mistresses.
Tiger’s Got Wood
2010 | Wicked | Cash Markman
The other big Tiger Woods porn parody starred Jonny Slim as the golfer, Diana Doll as his long-suffering wife, Evan Stone as her rebound man, and India Summer, Richelle Ryan, Madelyn Marie, Krissy Lynn, Jazy Berlin, Heidi Mayne and Ryder Skye as mistresses.
Debbie Does Dallas
1978 | VCX | Jim Clark
One of the most famous porno flicks of all time. Though the Dallas Cowboy Cheeerleaders had been around in some form for years, 1978 was the season when they became pop culture cheesecake sensations. In the XXX parody, Bambi Woods plays a high school cheerleader raising money to travel to Dallas for “Texas Cowgirls” tryouts.
Cicciolina e Moana “Mondiali”
1990 | Euro Sexe | Mario Bianchi
When Italy hosted the 1990 World Cup, pornstars Cicciolina and Moana Pozzi helped out the home team by seducing various foreign stars. That’s the plot of this porno flick, at least. Featuring Ron Jeremy as Diego Maradona (!!!), Sean Michaels as Ruud Gullit, and Eric Price as Jurgen Klinsmann.
Chyna is Queen of the Ring
2012 | Vivid | B. Skow
Chyna (aka Joanie Laurer) stars in this gangbang parody, taking on pornstar impersonators of The Iron Sheik, Ric Flair, Triple H, Stone Cold Steve Austin, John Cena, The Rock and Hulk Hogan. Also featuring Evan Stone and Lisa Ann as fake Vince and Stephanie McMahon.
Not Monday Night Football XXX
2009 | LFP | Will Ryder
The filmmakers took some historical liberties by pairing announcers John Madden and Howard Cosell (played by pornstar impersonators, of course), who ham it up in the booth while introducing various pregame orgies. The final scene features Evan Stone as legendary QB “Manhattan Joe”.